Coyote Ugly!?

Well people I must be on a roll this month, let me tell you about my newest adventure....a friend of mine just opened a new restaurant/bar. I told him that I'd love to help out, we can all use some extra cash, so he says "sure, I got a great idea why don't you bartend!" Now I've never tended bar in my entire life but hey I thought this could be fun so I agreed. He told his bar manager and the manager agreed to give me some on the job training. Now I'm excited, we've all seen the movie Coyote Ugly, I couldn't wait to go home and get my bartendin outfit ready, which included some sassy black heels! Well let me tell you about this "Coyote Ugly" night people! I got there and figured I'd be cutting lemons and filling the olive bin, WRONG I was learning the correct amount of alcohol to pour, how to use the bar computer system, make long island iced teas and more! "Wait a minute?!!, Did I just unknowingly sign up for a real job??!!!!! What was I thinking! But now it was too late, I was working with another bartender and she was awesome, she told me how to make things and taught me a lot and then, that's when it happened.....customers started pouring in and flocked to the bar for drinks, I was frozen and people started calling to get my attention and place drink orders, I stared getting frazzled! I was becoming undone!!! So what did I do? Yup, I went "Dawnie style", I broke out into a rendition of "On the good ship lollypop" and then I threw myself onto the floor and did the worm, stood up and recited poetry and for the finale I put up my easel and started painting peoples portraits,(thank God I remembered to bring that bag of props!) "Ta Da!!!!" But there was no applause! I thought for sure if I did the "Dawny show" they would forget all about ordering drinks! I didn't know what went wrong my parents always loved that show! I decided to buckle down and try and help this other bar tender, I was pouring beer and wine and when I got drink order I didn't know she would call out, (discreetly, thank goodness) what was in it so I could make it. Now I was extremely busy but had the audacity to grab my phone and text Donna, Tricia and April a one lined text "Coyote ugly SOS, man down!" And you know my girls shot me back words of encouragement, including "Get out of there!" And "Did you send that package to Whole Foods?", and the ever popular, "Do you want me to come get you?!" You guys know I'm just kidding, they were very supportive as usual! My feet were killing me, what possessed me to put on heels? When I looked down I realized that somewhere during my show I must have put my shoes back on the wrong feet, well that’s what it felt like! After about 3 hours I was kind of, yes I repeat, kind of holding my own! People would call out a drink order and slowly, I began to get it. I put my hand up like Larry Fishburne in the Matrix and motioned for them to give me more, I was slowly dodging bullets, like Neo, I was becoming...THE ONE!!! Okay, okay I wasn't that good but I was feelin good. At the end of the night we counted our tips and we did a couple of hundred dollars each!!!! I have been bitten by the bar bug! So if you come in and see me at the bar, sit down and wait for the next "Dawny Show", It's usually every 10 minutes or when an unknown drink order is thrown my way!